Positive Meditation: Happiness Skills for Life
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How life changes with a little mindfulness!

30/10/2012

3 Comments

 
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I wanted to share some feedback from a recent client which illustrates the benefits that mindfulness and self-enquiry can bring to our lives...

1. What are you overall thoughts on the Positive Meditation techniques and the way they are taught?

Although I booked the course myself with no pressure from anybody else I was still sceptical as I have lived my whole life with negative emotions at the forefront of all of my thinking. I wanted the changes but thought that maybe I was beyond repair and would end up stressing you out.....little did I know. 

After the first session I had to book up the next 3 sessions straight away as I had made a giant step towards believing that life does not have to be horrible, pressured and full of anxious negative thoughts. 

Once I could see that I had a choice on how to view topics, situations, emotions, fears, anxieties and the world around me, I felt empowered and actually looked forward to experiencing the things that used to send me into a negative place, so that I could practice changing the way I feel about them, (I am still practising, and probably will be for many years to come, or maybe the rest of my life). 

I still get an adrenaline rush when something 'bad' occurs (rainy days, neighbours dog etc), but now I question myself and reassure myself that I can be happy and positive (and keep smiling) throughout. The meditation time is a peaceful time for me to practice Dharma meditation (as that works for me), it is relaxing and refreshing and a great chance to control my thoughts, not banish them.

2. What benefits has Positive Meditation brought to your life?

I feel much more in control, in many ways by letting myself be out of control. I always felt like I had to know the answer, be responsible or just take charge. Now I enjoy looking at situations thinking, for instance, 'if the car breaks down and I don't know how to fix it, I am not a failure, I am allowed not to know this because I am not a mechanic'. 

I feel more powerful by letting go of power and realising that I am allowed not to know things, I will make mistakes, I am not perfect, and the person giving me permission for this release is myself (through the tools of Mindfulness Techniques and turnarounds, with the control practice of Meditation).

I was on holiday last week in Weymouth with my wife and we were shopping in a local market, my wife knows I hate shopping and after about 15 minutes of me not saying anything (not ignoring anybody, just not speaking), my wife said "Oh come on lets go, I can see you've had enough!", to which I replied, "I started to feel like I had had enough but now I am quietly working through it, and I am concentrating on being with family, in the sun and not being in work, so I am actually feeling quite good and relaxed". 

We shopped for another hour or so and I really didn't feel down or concentrate on being bored. The experience left me feeling good, not only because I had been happy all day, but because I knew that only 3 weeks before my wife would have been absolutely correct and I could have ruined that day for myself and her by letting a long held hatred of 'shopping' ruin a perfectly good day.  I questioned myself, looked at the turn rounds and decided that 'Shopping should be enjoyable' actually translated into 'I should be enjoyable' (for myself). 

These steps are really encouraging and people around me have noticed a difference, prompting a quote from my Dad of "Have you been drinking?", as I was chilled out and smiling (I had not touched a drop by the way)....

I have been so impressed with the changes I have experienced and find it heartening that people that don't know I have been to see you have also commented on my 'more relaxed' attitude.

Paul Wilson. 
Bristol 2012

3 Comments

Compassion starts with us, with our own body...

11/10/2012

1 Comment

 
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When we learn to meditate, what we are essentially learning is how to be kind to ourselves. By taking time to come out of the attachments of the thinking mind (the ego) and to be still, to be present with the body, we are allowing ourselves to listen to the most caring part of our being.

We may think that our thoughts care about us but in reality is that true? Have you ever had a thought which in hindsight you realised was negative or harmful to your being? If so then you will be able to see that your thoughts do not always serve your best interest.

Your body however cannot lie. It can only respond. And it responds perfectly every time. If you believe a stressful thought then your body will react accordingly and you will begin to feel the sensations of stress in your body. If you believe a peaceful, liberating thought then your body will enter a state of calm and you will feel your natural state of joy. 

So we are able to bring compassion into this world simply by questioning the stressful thoughts and seeing them to be false and understanding them to be harmful to us. The moment we do this and we replace the stressful thought with a peaceful thought we begin to feel much much better. We have made one person on this planet suffer less. We have been compassionate.

In fact, there is only one person that we can heal. And that is ourselves. 

Once we start being kinder to ourselves then we cannot help but be kinder to others. And through that kindness we invite others to heal themselves. Compassion and kindness are catching. They are viral. And they always start with us.

Love



1 Comment

I find it difficult to sit and meditate and cannot empty my mind. what can I try instead?

2/10/2012

0 Comments

 
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If you find sitting in meditation to be hard, unfulfilling or unhelpful then I suggest any kind of movement meditation can be more useful. Dance, yoga, walking, Tai Chi, etc all involve us moving awareness away from thinking into the body. This allow us to develop sensitivity in the body so that we learn to feel the effects that our thoughts have on our body

Meditation is ultimately not about emptying the mind (which is not possible for long periods of time) but rather about learning to love your thoughts and explore them. To find which thoughts are true and healthy and which are not true and cause pain. All forms of meditation are only temporary and without the use of self-enquiry we can often find ourselves back dealing with the same thoughts time and time again. 

The process of self-enquiry occupies the mind in a very enjoyable and ultimately liberating way. There is always something to enquire about (even if the thought is 'I should be better at this meditation stuff!')...



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Boundaries allow us to be open, to be vulnerable and thus to find peace...

2/10/2012

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"When you can meet your own vulnerability without armoring yourself against it, you begin to discover what I call "radical openness." All the higher emotions—generosity, gratitude, compassion, forgiveness, and especially, humility—emerge from this place of openness and vulnerability

In order to hold and bear the acute experience of vulnerability, you need an appropriate container. The practice of consciously putting up boundaries is part of creating a container. Creating a boundary can mean something as simple as maintaining a physical distance between you and another person, setting personal limits, being able to say "no" appropriately, and understanding whom you're willing to let into your intimate inner circle. Another form of container is a relationship of trust—certain friendships, your teacher, or a practice community can help you find safe spaces in which to open.

Eventually, when you are living in that center, you may start to experiment. How open can I be in this situation? What do I do when I feel overwhelmed by others' energies? A mature practitioner knows when to put up an energetic barrier or shield, and a kind of automatic protective energy system comes into play when needed. He or she also knows when a barrier or shield is just a device that's blocking intimacy.

When you allow yourself to consciously enter the state of vulnerability, you find that at its heart is peace. The peace that comes from standing poised in the aching heart of life. The peace that is your true protection, your invulnerable core." Sally Kempton.

http://www.yogajournal.com/wisdom/2564?utm_source=Wisdom&utm_medium=newsletter&utm_campaign=Wisdom

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    Blog Author

    Mark Dunn lives in Bristol where he teaches Positive Meditation and Mindfulness skills to the wonderful people that live in that great city. 

    This blog contains ideas and techniques for leading a happier, more peaceful life. These ideas come from Mark and also through others who share their positivity.  

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